Nobody likes awkward situations

If you handle them before they arrive
When they come up you’ll get out alive

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Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

Your friend, Tyrone, who's had a thing for you for the past 2 years, invites you over for a party. When you arrive you discover everybody else conveniently couldn't come—aka he only invited you. He doesn't want you to feel like you wasted your time driving over so he offers to put on a movie—your choice: on the TV or in the enclosed home theater. That would be great. If only others were here. Or he never made unwelcome moves on you. Do you
Pick the home theater. Why bother with a futile argument?
Definitely the TV. Open space? Light? Yes, please!
Suggest a new no-chance-of-cuddling activity
Matter-of-factly tell him you’re going home
Bluntly call him out on his intentions and say you’re not interested

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

Congratulations on giving in so soon (you could've held off for longer)! Before the previews have ended Tyrone has his arm around you. Is it too late to suddenly come down with the flu?
When he tries to kiss you, cough violently or sneeze and say you're getting sick
Ask to go home
Deal with it. You can say—from experience—that it won't work out between you. 228 more minutes… Couldn't LOTR be any shorter!?

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

You are surprised when Tyrone actually agrees to watch the movie on the TV. He sits close enough to you that you instantly develop claustrophobia, and discover how easily adaptable his plan is. You
Use your default excuse to get up (i.e."I need to go to the bathroom"). When you get back you can sit away from him.
Let him sit that close

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

Tyrone is not taking chances. He's finally got you alone and he's been waiting for this opportunity for a long time. You
Absolutely insist on an activity. Of your choosing.
Give in and watch the movie

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

Unfortunately, going home is not an option. Immature as it is, he's begging and pleading and threatening to barricade the door. Talk about awkward… Do you
Give in. "Alright, alright! We can watch a movie!"
Push him aside (karate chop his arm for a dramatic Jackie Chan effect) and make a run for it. Don't stop until you're in your car.

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

Bad idea. You've explicitly brought up the topic so he feels free to make a move. When you said, "I know you're going to try to hold my hand, but I'm not into you," he heard, "Hold my hand" and "Into you." Selective listener? Unfortunately… You decide to
Repeat what you said before. MUCH LOUDER. Right in his ear.
Hey, if it makes him happy for the night, why can't you loan out your hand for 2 hours?
Throw both arms in the air when he reaches for your hand, and yell the first thing that pops into your head—"They're not for sale!"

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

As forward as Tyrone is, you have just propelled yourself into eternal awkwardness. This situation probably could have gone smoother (and definitely been less awkward), but at least he won't try to get close to you anymore tonight. On the upside, you'll never have to worry about him again. On the downside, you've probably just lost a friend.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
Try a new situation

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

You thought you could get out of this consequence-free, but you just ended up participating in some PDA. He's breeched the barrier and physical contact has been made! No resistance on your part means you automatically receive girlfriend status! Your only option now is to break up with him. Good luck! *Drama ensues*
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

You're sitting down again—on the opposite side of the couch—but you're not getting off so easily. He knows your little tricks, and he can play the game too. While he excuses himself to get a drink, you have a minute to determine the best way to get him to sit away from you. You've used up your bathroom excuse; desperate times call for desperate measures.
By the time he comes back you have no viable excuses, and in a moment of panic, give up and give in.
Grab and hug a pillow. If you're holding a pillow you can't hold hands. When he returns stroke the fabric and say you like his taste in pillows.

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

Your stubbornness paid off. Temporarily. Tyrone agrees to play a game to appease you, but only for 15 minutes. After that, the two of you are definitely watching the movie. You've basically brought yourself around full-circle. You now have the following choices
Watch the movie in his home theater
Watch it on his TV
Tell him you're going home
Straight out tell him you aren't interested in the romance thing, you're friends, and nothing more

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

You're watching the movie now? Oh boy. Where will it be?
In his home theater
On the TV

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

Tyrone is faster than you are, but while he was recovering from his surprise you got a head start. Now he's chasing after you. This would be so romantic—straight out of the movies—if only it wasn't Tyrone. Do you
Keep running, get into your car, and drive away. Leave the scene and avoid inevitable awkwardness. Right?
Caught up in the moment, you stop and turn around. This is basically a scene from a chick flick anyway. You might as well watch a movie.

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

Tyrone gives you a funny look, realizes you're not taking the hint (hello, he wants to hold your hand!!), and just goes for it. You verbally resist—your hands are not for sale!—so he asks if he can put his arm around you.
You tell him, "Yes." He is waaay too persistent and you're too shy to be bold and say what's on your mind.
Heck no! It's not time to surrender yet. He is more than welcome to keep his hands and arms to himself!
Hesitate, but say, "Yes." Awkwardly lean forward so his arm touches the couch and not you, and then lie–"This position is comfortable."

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

You have just, understandably, hurt and/or angered him, but you got out of there and by a fortunate turn of events (or careful planning) you manage to avoid seeing him for a long time. Moving across the state and dumping all of your mutual friends helped a lot, not to mention the fact that what you did led him to steer clear of you too. When you run into him 3 years later all is forgotten (or at least forgiven) and you're both happy to see each other and catch up. Friendship resumes and an awkward situation has been avoided!
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
Try a new situation

Awkward Relationships

What will you do when Tyrone invites
you over and tries to make a move?

This situation is now more awkward for you than it is for him. You get away with no hand holding or smooching, but you leave after the movie with a severe knot in your back. You'd grab the phone book to call the chiropractor if only you could bend over to pick up the book...
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Awkward Etiquette

Is there a tactful way to tell Midge
she has something between her teeth?

You and Midge are eating lunch together in the food court at the mall. Midge takes a bite, chews, and then begins to tell you something. As soon as she opens her mouth you notice something green stuck between her teeth. Obviously telling her straight out is not an option. Who does that anyway? Awkward… You
Look anywhere but her mouth. Fake a nosebleed so you can look at the ceiling. Try to ignore it. It's big enough she'll notice it soon.
Wait until you're finished eating and ask if you have anything stuck between your teeth. Maybe she'll ask you the same.
Offer her a piece of gum
Make the universal you-have-something-stuck-between-your-teeth gesture.
Purposely wedge something between your teeth. If she makes a comment it'll be easy to tell her she has something in her teeth too.

Awkward Etiquette

Is there a tactful way to tell Midge
she has something between her teeth?

The keyword here is try to ignore it. It's kind of disgusting, but that thing is front and center, massive, and green. Unfortunately she hasn't noticed it 15 minutes later, so that plan didn't work. Awkward situation NOT avoided.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Awkward Etiquette

Is there a tactful way to tell Midge
she has something between her teeth?

Awkward situation avoided! But only if no mirrors are involved. If Midge sees the size of that intruder she'll feel really awkward because she'll know you saw it earlier and didn't say anything. If she doesn't ask, you'll part ways soon enough and she'll discover it herself later.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
Try a new situation

Awkward Etiquette

Is there a tactful way to tell Midge
she has something between her teeth?

Hopefully the gum will help pull that thing out. If you notice it's not working keep giving her more pieces of gum. Increase the sticky surface area, increase the chance of it coming out, right? If it still isn't working maybe you can get her mouth so full of gum that she won't be able to talk and you won't have to see that green thing anymore. Or maybe she'll drool or the gum will accidentally fall out of her mouth, then by comparison the green thing will be much less awkward.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
Try a new situation

Awkward Etiquette

Is there a tactful way to tell Midge
she has something between her teeth?

Awkward situation avoided! Midge will appreciate you letting her know without making a big deal about an embarrassing situation.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
Try a new situation

Awkward Etiquette

Is there a tactful way to tell Midge
she has something between her teeth?

So in order to avoid an awkward situation you purposefully make it more awkward for everyone involved? That makes sense… Awkward situation not evaded. Since she's probably facing the same etiquette dilemma as you are, maybe you should just pull out some floss, start using it, and then offer her some as well.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
Try a new situation

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Walking across campus to your next class you see Ralf way off in the distance. You're pretty sure it's him. But then again, maybe it isn't… You're worried about seeming rude so you
Pretend you don't see him. He's still pretty far away anyway. If it really is Ralf you'll come up with an excuse.
Change directions and walk somewhere else. Avoidance is the perfect solution.
Wave to get his attention. If he waves back you'll know it's him. If it's not him, you'll just appear very social.
Wait for him to wave at you so you don't feel like an idiot
Start smiling

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You get within talking range and it is, in fact, your friend. What are you going to tell him?
"Oh hey! I didn't see you there!"
"Sorry, I just forgot to wear my glasses today. I'm totally blind."
"I wasn't sure that was you from way back there."

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You decide to go the long way to class to avoid a potentially awkward encounter with Ralf. The plan has worked so far, but now you think you see Frank. He's just far enough away… And there's no alternate route. You're going to have to face him. You
Pretend you don't see him
Wave at him
Wait for him to wave
Smile at him

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You start waving and he's waving back, but now you're not so sure it is him. Maybe he's a stranger and just waving because you're waving… You
Keep waving and smiling. The worst that could happen is you don't know him and will never see him again.
Pretend you were actually adjusting your sleeve. Sometimes it looks like someone is waving when they are adjusting shirt sleeves, right?

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Uh-oh. Now he's waving, but he's still too far away to know for sure if you know him or not.
Wave back
Smile so broadly that everyone within a 3 mile radius can see your big grin
Do nothing

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You're smiling and now you're a little closer. Is he who you thought he was?
Yes
No

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Unless you're a thespian and genuinely look surprised to see him, he will probably know you're telling him a little lie. Fortunately you've avoided an awkward situation and he has no hard feelings. (He pretended not to see you either!)
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
Try a new situation

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Maybe it was just the pressure of finding an excuse that made you say it, but you don't wear glasses. He comments, "Oh, I didn't know you wear glasses!" Now you have a choice
Admit you lied and actually have 20/20 vision
Play along with what you already said. It's not like this lie is elaborate or harmful and you'd rather not deal with the awkwardness.

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Good choice. Why would this simple little encounter be something you needed to lie about in the first place? Maybe it's a little embarrassing, but the truth is always the best thing to hear. And you've managed to avoid the ever-awkward waving to someone you don't know situation.
Start this awkward situation over (really?)
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You keep waving and smiling and *phew!* it really is him! He's close enough to recognize for sure, and waving back, but now Belinda (right behind him), who you only kind of know, starts waving at you too. You
Ignore Belinda. If she thinks you didn't notice her, you'll spare her some embarrassment when she sees what was really going on.
Casually say hi to her. It'll be only slightly awkward when she sees you talking to the guy in front of her and realizes you were waving to him.
Tell Belinda you actually weren't waving at her

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You probably feel triumphant and inconspicuous, but everybody who saw you knows exactly what was going on—you were waving and then tried to cover it up. Regardless of whether or not you know him, you've just created an awkward situation for yourself and a laughable one for everybody else.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

When he gets closer you realize
You're 99.9% sure it's him. Just a little closer and...
It wasn't who you thought it was. Is it a he? Maybe it's a she? Oh, it's Alex, the janitor from work.
You don't know him at all

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

When you are a little closer, he looks like
He's upset you didn't mirror the same enthusiasm to see him
He's not overly concerned with your lack of gusto

Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You did in fact spy your friend from all that way away! Since he saw you smiling, he perceived you as happy to see him. The two of you strike up a quick conversation before heading off to class. No awkward situation here!
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Hey, friendly smiley person, you! Turns out you don't know this passerby. It was just his jacket (your friend has the same one) that threw you off. Your came across as a generally happy and friendly person, and as he passed, he returned the favor and said hi. Maybe you just made his day. Awkward situation successfully avoided!
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You avoided an awkward situation in the moment, but now you've got a charade to keep up. If you find some non-prescription glasses (they're trendy now anyway) you'll have to make sure he sees you wearing them since you are self proclaimed "blind without them." Just be prepared to awkwardly be called out on it by others and have a good explanation about your new accessory. You'll also need to have a new excuse handy when you think you see him from a distance again.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Awkward situation mostly avoided, for both you and Belinda. On her side, while she thinks you didn't see her, she still feels a little awkward and stupid because other people saw her waving. On your side, now you have to deal with feeling that you were rude. You would have been better off acknowledging her. Maybe next time!
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Congratulations on choosing to be the least awkward you could have been! Belinda will be glad that her wave was not in vain and you will be glad you were über friendly.
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Rude! Way to make her feel stupid? That was completely unnecessary. Go and apologize to her right now.
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Awkward… and not awkward. This is now a complex situation. You avoided an awkward situation in the moment because you and Alex are acquaintances, but because you finally acknowledged the kid in public, Alex (who's crushing on you) thinks the feeling is mutual. Prepare to be hit on big time at work!
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

Your face just turned red enough to put a tomato to shame and you feel awkward. That awkwardness is compounded when the stranger unexpectedly lets out a little laugh before containing the rest of it—you were waving rather eccentrically trying to get his attention. While you will probably never see him again (sparing you from future embarrassment) you could drastically change your hairstyle and color, invest in cosmetic surgery, and buy a new wardrobe to ensure he doesn't recognize you if you ever cross paths again.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Everyday Awkwardness

On a scale of One to Awkward
where does waving to a stranger fit in?

You've failed in your original plight to not seem rude. An excuse isn't going to cut it. Tell him the truth and find out why he's so excited in order to make it up to your friend.
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Social Awkwardness

Saying "Hi Whatsherface," is rude.
But seriously, what's her name?

You hear a cheerful voice call out your name, turn around, and its…uh-oh. You forgot her name! You know she told you when you first met 3 months ago, but because you missed the opportunity to ask in the first few encounters, you are now in awkward territory. You rack your brain, but can't remember for the life of you. You
Let your ego take a blow and just ask her
Tell yourself, "Heck no, my ego won't take a blow. I'm going to get creative here!"

Social Awkwardness

Saying "Hi Whatsherface," is rude.
But seriously, what's her name?

You're deep enough into this, digging around a little deeper isn't going to hurt. You decide to
Tell her you should catch a movie or grab lunch sometime soon. Hand over your phone and tell her to put in her digits and info.
Prepare yourself for your next encounter. Start searching Facebook profile pictures and narrow the results by city, school, and workplace.
Beula walks by in the nick of time! Introduce her, but let Whatsherface say her own name. After she does, apologize for your lack of manners.
Invite her to a magic show and ensure she is called up as a volunteer. The magician will be your hero when he asks her what her name is.

Social Awkwardness

Saying "Hi Whatsherface," is rude.
But seriously, what's her name?

Let's face it—you are going to feel awkward asking, but as soon as you know her name (and apologize profusely 100 times), the awkwardness will dissipate for you (it never was really awkward for her; just humorous). To downplay your awkwardness, try making a joke to get yourself to laugh. Say her name repeatedly in your head until you get home and then write her name on a post-it which you stick to your front door. Don't forget it again!
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Social Awkwardness

Saying "Hi Whatsherface," is rude.
But seriously, what's her name?

Awkward situation successfully avoided…unless she doesn't put her name into your phone for you. If she doesn't, resist telling her you're a terrible speller and could she spell her name for you (if it's something common and simple like "Sue" you'll feel like an idiot). If she leaves the name field blank, delete her number, and then the next time you run into her tell her you accidentally deleted it. Pretend you are in a hurry, give her your number, tell her to text you with your name since you might forget to add her into your contacts immediately. And you definitely don't want to forget who that text is from.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
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Social Awkwardness

Saying "Hi Whatsherface," is rude.
But seriously, what's her name?

No you won't. This is the worst idea you could have had. Five hours into your search your eyes are bloodshot and you still have no idea who the heck she is so you admit defeat. Give up. You tried. You failed. One of you will eventually move or lose contact and then it won't matter anymore. But if that's not good enough for you (or if in 3 weeks you decide otherwise) your options are as follows
Let your ego take a blow and just ask her
Try another creative method
You are seriously giving up and just want to try a new situation

Social Awkwardness

Saying "Hi Whatsherface," is rude.
But seriously, what's her name?

Awkward situation kind of avoided. You'll have to bear it for about 5 seconds until she gets the hint that you're not going to say her name for her. You could even throw in a comment like, "Half the time I forget to introduce myself!" with a forced laugh to make yourself feel a little better. At least you got the information you wanted.
Start this awkward scenario over (really?)
Try a new situation

Social Awkwardness

Saying "Hi Whatsherface," is rude.
But seriously, what's her name?

This is certainly a stretch. Quite the elaborate plan. If all goes according to plan…all goes according to plan and there will be no awkwardness. Just be prepared for her to be busy that night. Or to not get called up on stage, to hear her name wrong, or to miss it when someone in the audience shouts over her. Your only option at this point is to quickly steal her purse while she's on stage and find her ID. Or hope she runs into an old friend as you're leaving that will yell out her name. If that doesn't work then you're out of luck. Darn it.
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